be free from unhealthy relationships (lesson one) ...a blog ...
how to stop clinging (lesson one) …
If you’re trying to hold onto someone even though you know it’s a hopeless situation then you are resisting the inevitable. When it’s time for someone to go you can’t fight it. The relationship time with them has passed, even if it hurts. Surrender to what is.... surrendering to what is ...
Think of a time you were clinging to someone you were in love with. What were you feeling? What was behind the clinging? Was there another action you could have taken to not cling?
What does it feel like to show someone that you have been clinging to that you are now independent? Does it feel empowering?
My clinging …
The last time I was clinging to someone felt awful. I felt abandoned. Full of anxiety. And oh so desperate to end how I felt.
I think the fear of abandonment comes from deep deep within. I feel that my mother abandoned me and I’m not sure how to control the feelings I have, they actually over power me.
Another thing I could have done was speak to myself in a strong and calm voice telling myself that everything is OK and that the adult in me will take over now and remind myself of all the wrong things about the relationship.
If she is to love life and freedom and be brave then she must learn to let go. To see beauty without clinging to it, to feel pain without holding it hostage, and to feel love without worry of losing it.
No longer clinging …
I will feel strong and independent showing the person I have been clinging to that I no longer cling to them. It will feel freeing … I need to let things take their own course and stop being attached to outcome.
There are two questions a man must ask himself: The first is ‘Where am I going?’ and the second is ‘Who will go with me?’
If you ever get these questions in the wrong order you are in trouble.
The next time you feel insecure or lonely, try not to reach out to the emotionally unavailable person you are currently attached to. Instead, see how you get through it on your own. Write about your feelings that come up in your journal.
Try to imagine life without the stress of an emotionally unavailable person’s confusing behavior. Get to know how it feels to have emotional space free of them. Write about your feelings in your journal.
Visualize yourself in a relationship with someone who’s sure of their love for you. Someone who makes you feel secure. Someone who has never disappointed or betrayed you. Describe your relationship in your journal? What is that person like? How do you feel with them?
The next time …
I can stand on my own two feel emotionally. I can supply everything that I need in terms of emotional stability and security. I do not need anyone who finds it so easy to walk out on me and to walk away from me. This last time that you did it, you did damage beyond repair. Damage that you haven’t even tried to fix and it feel liberating letting go of you like you let go of me. I am no longer a slave to the addictive emotions and feelings that I have within this relationship.
there is a place where you can go, that you can feel safe and look inside yourself and discover yourself – betty ford
I see peace, calm and balance in my life without the ups and downs of your threats to leave and move on without me. This is the place that I can support myself and I don’t need you.
GO go go … I would not have you back again …
I see myself in a secure and committed relationships with a man who truly truly loves me. He is capable of putting himself aside for my needs and he makes me feel secure with his communication and his ability to see my needs and lack and he makes a loving and kind effort to fill that void. He doesn’t, EVER, lie to me about anything. He is man enough to admit his errors and he isn’t sneaky about anything.
When someone love you, they don’t have to say it. You can tell by the way they treat you.
- Go on dating sites online. It will also show you the abundance of people out there. You might also meet someone new who is even better than your ex or a person you’re trying to let go of.
- Distract yourself – do whatever it takes to not think about your ex or a person you’re trying to let go of even if it feels counterintuitive.
- Call someone in your support system.
Heal Yourself with Writing: Course Overview
Lesson 1: How To Stop Clinging
Lesson 2: Going Through A Breakup
Lesson 3: Building A Support System
Lesson 4: How To Not Act Desperate
Lesson 5: Obsessing
Lesson 7: Your Psychological History
Ms Denise Mijatovic ... (aka indigo ...)
lead me ... blog writer ...
I am the owner and main author of me ... website. I want to keep this bit short and sweet so if you want to read more about me then please go to 'about me'.